The beautiful colours of Fall are breathtaking.

During this cooler time of the year, it’s magical to watch the leaves fall from the trees preparing for the cooler weather ahead.

Every year the trees trust to follow the same pattern knowing that once again in the Spring their leaves will bloom again.

If we watch nature, we can learn a lot. Fall is a great time for us also to slow down from the busy Summer months.

Fall can be a check point into reviewing goals and dreams. To let go of which ones no longer fit and to start to prepare to go inwards during the colder months to plant seeds of ideas to bloom in the Spring.

Following the pattern of nature, the Fall and Winter months are a good time to rest and plan out what life goals you would to achieve in the new year. Take the time during these seasons to research, and organize ideas.

The colder months allow us the opportunity to be still with ourselves and hear our inner voices. Take the time to listen and nurture what you hear to allow it to grow and manifest in the Springtime.

I know this feeling – the sadness, anger, and fear. The fog and numbness that takes over my being. Grief is never a friend that stops over, it’s an unwanted guest that shows up uninvited.

You can’t prepare for the visit, even if you think it’s near. There isn’t the right thing to wear. The right thing to say or do.

I have often said that grief is the private club that no one chooses to join. Grasping the depths of emotions that are felt emotionally, physically and mentally can’t be imagined until you have a personal experience.

I have tried to hide from it, pretend it wasn’t affecting me, however, I realized it’s something I need to learn to be with.

I decided to take the step and to sit with the grief – the overwhelming feeling of despair that I wanted to run from. To be with the feelings that are coming up.

By sitting with each emotion I am able to process what the loss means to me. I have accepted that it’s a part of life and will happen time and time again. Each time surprising me with it’s intensity.

Grief is not a social club, it’s a truly a private club to journey in our own individual way.

The title sounds pretty obvious, don’t we all see people and situations through our own filters? However, the trick is seeing someone through their filter.

There are many times that I write a social media post or even a simple text to someone and the response is totally opposite from what I wrote.

I dream of the world where we would stop and ask for clarification. That’s what drives my friends crazy about me, I will ask for a word to be defined to ensure we both have the same meaning before I respond.

We communicate daily and in various forms due to technology, however, the amount of time truly understanding what someone means is given very little attention.

If we are to live in a diverse world we need to take the time to see the world through different perspectives. By doing this we build a greater awareness of the world around us.

Looking through a different filter provides information to a person’s story; it creates understanding to who they are. It’s the beginning of an authentic conversation.

Try it today in the next conversation you have with someone.

Jacqueline

Have you ever stepped out of your comfort zone and discovered a place that felt like home?

One of my goals in 2018 is to have what I call ‘heart 2 heart’ conversations with strangers. A connection that brings us to what’s deep within our hearts.

I experienced this at Raising Our Voices – sharing Black Canadian Stories, an event for Black History Month.

I decided to attend the event on my own. I sought out my seat during the main reception. I don’t like small talk. I find it uncomfortable and decided to sit and wait for the event to start.

I believe a conversation starts with a smile, and that’s what happened with Adam.

We started off with small talk, discussing the event we were attending. Soon I was sharing my passion for teaching heritage in the school system. Adam shared his thoughts, which aligned to my thinking. We both shared the view that conversations were necessary to create understanding.

Adam had my full attention when he said, “it’s important to remain open.” He elaborated by sharing that when we stand passionately in our opinions sometimes we don’t hear the other person or provide a space of dialogue.

The wait time until the event started was an hour, the time flew by like it was a 15-minute wait. That’s when I realized I had experience my goal, a ‘heart 2 heart’ moment where 2 hearts for a moment in time connect by the beat of each person.

Thank you Adam for being present – not looking at a device while you waited which allowed us to start a conversation.

Jacqueline

Is it really a new you? It’s interesting how we all get caught up with the end of year phrases such as ‘2018 will be my best year’, ’Out with old in with the new’ and so many others that we say to motivate ourselves to be better.

I believe in setting intentions and visualizing the life you desire. My concern at this time of year is the high expectations some people set without fully taking stock of where they are presently and what supports they will need to achieve their goals.

Many people will dismiss 2017 and move into 2018 saying it’s going to be a fresh start. However, there is value in building on the prior year. If you take a look at your goals for 2017, spending time reviewing them. The previous year is a foundation for what you will build in 2018.

Here are some questions to ask yourself:

What goals did I reach and the ones that I didn’t, were they truly my goals?
What prevented me from achieving my goals and dreams?
What do I want to continue in 2018 that didn’t get completed in 2017?

By reviewing previous goals it’s easier to decide if the goal was something you truly desired or was it set due to external standards. Life has twists and turns, things happen that can shift your goals; life changes such as death, divorce, and illness.

When you examine the year before you can search for the lesson in the experience. What did you learn from the challenges you faced? What did you discover about yourself? The moments that were awesome, they teach us what brings us joy.

To become the ‘New YOU’, in the new year, means taking along the old you and tweaking some areas. The old you still works, it’s like a car, it needs a tune up and attention in certain areas. Spend some time giving yourself an overhaul before you focus on being a new you.

Appreciate the you that you are right now!!

Photo by fossiled